I hear you on the plane phobia...I used to LOVE flying until two things happened. 1. 9/11 and 2. A pilot saying over the speakers on our plane "Due to weather conditions we cannot land in Chicago, and we cannot keep circling as we are running LOW ON FUEL.....we will go to Detroit to refuel and then go back to Chicago. I NEVER want to hear the words of a pilot saying we are running low on fuel...especially since it wasn't a dire situation. But with my anxiety it about did me in. I was bawling on the plane. Luckily family was with me.
Nowadays I take 2 Klonopin about an hour before the plane is scheduled to leave and I sleep through the flight comfortably. I tried flying after that fuel incident without anything and I was a mess, again.
Not saying drugs are always the answer but it's made me able to fly. I certainly couldn't without it.