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Thread: The Ten Commandments of Concertgoing

  1. #1
    Stuck on the Border DonFan's Avatar
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    Default The Ten Commandments of Concertgoing

    Excellent words of wisdom from a site called The Republican:

    By KEVIN O'HARE

    The guy to my left has his cell phone ringing and the couple to my right has taken about 200 pictures of the two of them with the stage in the background. The woman in back of me has been texting her friends through the whole show and that pie-eyed person in front of me just puked.

    Welcome to the wild, wonderful world of concert-going, 2009.

    You might say that crazy things have always gone on at concerts and you'd probably be right. There were always people at shows who were there to get lucky, get high or do anything other than listen to the music. But it's worse now. Believe me. I've been to nearly 2,000 concerts during the past three decades and it's never been this bad.

    The biggest problem is that more people than ever seem to be at concerts to make the scene more than actually hear the music. For many, making sure that every one of your friends knows you are at the Beyonce concert is far more important than hearing anything Beyonce sings. Getting the Carrie Underwood T-shirt, and wearing it to school the next day is a lot more of a status symbol than knowing whether the star was on-key or off. Showing your buddies the $500 ticket for the Rolling Stones' concert is way more critical than being sober enough to remember anything Mick Jagger sang after the third song of the night.

    Being able to say you saw this band or that singer was always good for the ego. Admit it. But there was a time, in a land far, far away, where the concert experience meant something incredibly special, the real-time, soul to soul connection between artists and fans. A time when fans could recite the set list of a Bruce Springsteen, Stevie Wonder or U2 show they attended 10 or 20 years ago, or at least recall the high points of the performance.

    Things have been slowly shifting for several years but it finally hit home for me at a John Legend concert at Smith College a few years back. While Legend was delivering a supremely soulful set, I looked around at all the lights flashing from the cell phones in the crowd. And I started counting. And I realized that hundreds of people in that audience weren't listening to anything the incredibly talented singer was delivering on stage. Instead they were either taking third-rate photos with their cell phone camera (typically of themselves with the stage in the background) or texting their friends ("Guess where I am! OMG!).

    That experience eventually led to this list of "10 Commandments of Concert Etiquette." I asked about 30 friends of varying ages to tell me about some of their own best and worst experiences at shows and they gave me some great feedback. You might hate it, you might like it, but if you've gone to enough shows, I promise you will recognize some of the people in this column.


    1. Thou Shalt Not Get Drunk or High and Stupid Before the Show
    No one's against tailgating in the parking lot and no one's against people of legal age enjoying a couple of drinks at a show, as long as they don't get smashed and ruin the concert for everyone around them. I still vividly remember the guy in his 20s with the fabulous seat at the Rolling Stones' show in Fenway Park a few years ago. Totally wrecked when he walked into the venue, by the time the Stones hit the stage he was a slobbering idiot, falling off the extremely expensive 8th row seat he was standing on three times during the first three songs, tumbling onto other increasingly angry people in the crowd. Suddenly, Keith Richards seemed like a model of sobriety in comparison.

    2. Thou Shalt Not Arrive Late at a Concert and Rudely Demand People to Get Out of "My Seat."

    This happens at sporting events too, all the time in fact. What's worse than the two people who show up an hour after the time printed on the ticket, and the guy with a beer in each hand makes his way to where you're sitting, pushes past a few people and shouts "Hey you're in my seat!" First of all, more often than not, you're in the right seat and they've got it wrong. But couldn't they at least be polite about it? They're the ones who are late! How about, "Hi, we got stuck in traffic, but I think you may be sitting in my seat?" It's a lot better approach and a lot less confrontational.

    3. Thou Shalt Not Covet the Souvenir Tables More than the Concert
    This is a particular pet peeve. Look, everyone likes a cool t-shirt as either a fashion statement or a permanent memory of a great show. Artists these days make a fortune on their souvenir tables. But too many people walk into venues, and before a note is played spend hundreds of dollars on souvenirs just so they can say they saw Madonna, Bruce Springsteen, Martina McBride, Kelly Clarkson or others. Actually seeing them is secondary compared with having the t-shirt that proves you were there. With ticket prices as high as they are these days, the t-shirts, programs, posters, etc. are often a luxury. And they're not more important than what happens on stage. Remember, it's still the music that matters, not what you wear the next day to school.

    4. Thou Shalt Not Get Angry at Artists Who Fail to Play Note-by-Note Versions of their Greatest Hits in Concert
    Look, more than likely, they are going to play plenty of songs you know. They'd be fools not to. But they've also got to do a few songs off their new album because that's what they are trying to promote. And they also may want to improvise on some of the hits just a bit, so as to keep the show exciting for them too.
    Concert set lists frequently trigger a huge debate among ticket-holders, a debate that is worthy of a lot more space than we have here. You do deserve to hear some of the music that you would expect. But you are by no means guaranteed that you will hear every one of your favorite songs just because you bought a ticket. And if you are going to see someone like Bob Dylan, Neil Young, Alicia Keys or Bruce Springsteen, who hardly ever play the same set list twice, be ready for some surprises. It's part of the fun.

    5. Thou Shalt Not Scream Out Requests.
    Don't scream out for stars to play their biggest hit the moment they take the stage. That is especially true if you're in a in a small venue where everyone can hear you. Most performers work from a set list and will play their biggest hits. They don't need you to remind them the second they say "Good evening Northampton." You're being obnoxious and you're actually risking getting the artist so angry you may not end up hearing the song at all.

    6. Thou Shalt Not Use Cell Phones to Text Your Friends During Concerts, to Talk on the Phone During Quiet Moments or to Take Countless Goofy Pictures of You and Your Date with the Performers on stage in the Background.
    This is the big one. It's all out of hand. At a Sugarland concert a while ago, I looked around and it seemed like the entire sold-out crowd was texting someone else, maybe someone in the crowd, more likely someone who was unable to get tickets. "We r at the show! So Cool! Miss U! Cya!"
    Good grief. Could you listen to just a few of the songs for just a few minutes? What did they just sing? You forgot what they played? What a surprise.

    As for the photos, a lot of people, including yours truly, love photos. Take a couple. Take 10 if you want if the performer is o.k. with that. But more than 100? Of you and your date AT the show? Give it a rest.
    And while you are at it, put the cell phone on vibrate.

    7. Thou Shalt Not Make Out with Date During the Concert
    Bring it to a motel or bring it home. 'Nuff said.

    8. Thou Shalt Not Stand and Dance at a Show When No One Else is Standing and Dancing.
    This is one of the major great debates among concert goers. I seem to recall a fabulous "Saturday Night Live" skit on this subject years ago. Have you ever been in back of the only person standing at a show while everyone else was sitting? Have you ever asked them (politely please) to sit down? Have you ever gotten the response, "Hey buddy, I paid for this ticket I can do whatever I want."
    Well you CAN'T do whatever you want when it means you are blocking the sight lines of other people who also paid to see the show. And if you are standing in front of a smaller person, a kid, or a disabled person, you deserve to be tossed out of the building. No one is saying don't have fun. Have a blast. Watch the movement of the crowd. If people all over the place are dancing, then it's fine to get up and shake your money maker all you want. And if they're not, but you feel you've GOT to dance, then try and sneak to a location where you will not be blocking anyone else's view.

    9. Thou Shalt Not Walk Out of the Concert to make a Bathroom Run or a Food Run whenever the band plays something new or different.
    Poor Walter Becker. The "other guy" in Steely Dan, equally brilliant but often in Donald Fagen's shadow, had the spotlight to sing one song each night during their tour a few years ago. No matter where they played, when Becker's time came, there was a mass exodus to the bathrooms. Give the guy a chance. Show some respect. When you gotta go, you gotta go, but don't be so obvious.

    10. Thou Shalt Not Sing Louder Than the Person On Stage

    You may have paid a lot of money for your tickets but that does not protect you from the yahoo in back of you who insists on singing-along (off key of course) to every song during the concert. Here's a reminder: Sometimes the emotional excitement does get overwhelming. But remember - people did not come to the show to hear YOU sing, and, just guessing mind you, but the odds are you are no Don Henley. They came to hear the star. If you must sing-along, do it quietly. And of course there are exceptions for when everyone in the stadium is singing like a European football match and Bono wants it that way.

  2. #2
    Moderator Troubadour's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Ten Commandments of Concertgoing

    LOL. Love it, DF. I'm sure our guys would be nodding their heads in agreement, too. The Don mention made me all warm inside!


    you better put it all behind you, baby, 'cause life goes on
    you keep carrying that anger, it'll eat you up inside--



  3. #3
    Moderator Ive always been a dreamer's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Ten Commandments of Concertgoing

    Good list - but, as usual, the people that need these lists the most never read them.

    "People don't run out of dreams: People just run out of time ..."
    Glenn Frey 11/06/1948 - 01/18/2016

  4. #4
    Stuck on the Border Prettymaid's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Ten Commandments of Concertgoing

    I was going to say the same thing, Dreamer. Borderers seem to be good concert-goers.
    ~ Cathy ~

    And I dream I'm on vacation 'Cause I like the way that sounds,
    It's a perfect occupation for me.

  5. #5
    Stuck on the Border Glennhoney's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Ten Commandments of Concertgoing

    ..those commandments should be listed on the tickets...when I saw our guys in Boston this summer, there were these 2 youngish girls in front of me who were so drunk, I'm sure they had no idea where they were...luckily there were 2 other girls with them who seemed to be in better shape...and I could tell they were truly embarrased by their friends behavior..and the cell phones...they were just all over the place..and people were making calls and/or texting...but overall, I must admit my "neighbours" were pretty well behaved and totally into the concert..

  6. #6
    Border Rebel Fan_For_Life's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Ten Commandments of Concertgoing

    1. Thou Shalt Not Get Drunk or High and Stupid Before the Show
    guilty drunk, but not high and stupid

    2. Thou Shalt Not Arrive Late at a Concert and Rudely Demand People to Get Out of "My Seat."
    not guilty


    3. Thou Shalt Not Covet the Souvenir Tables More than the Concert
    not guilty


    4. Thou Shalt Not Get Angry at Artists Who Fail to Play Note-by-Note Versions of their Greatest Hits in Concert
    not guilty

    5. Thou Shalt Not Scream Out Requests.
    not guilty

    6. Thou Shalt Not Use Cell Phones to Text Your Friends During Concerts, to Talk on the Phone During Quiet Moments or to Take Countless Goofy Pictures of You and Your Date with the Performers on stage in the Background.
    not guilty

    7. Thou Shalt Not Make Out with Date During the Concert
    not guilty

    8. Thou Shalt Not Stand and Dance at a Show When No One Else is Standing and Dancing.
    guilty

    9. Thou Shalt Not Walk Out of the Concert to make a Bathroom Run or a Food Run whenever the band plays something new or different.
    guilty

    10. Thou Shalt Not Sing Louder Than the Person On Stage
    not guilty

  7. #7
    Stuck on the Border zeldabjr's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Ten Commandments of Concertgoing

    thought this post was cute...

    Quote Originally Posted by Fan_For_Life View Post
    1. Thou Shalt Not Get Drunk or High and Stupid Before the Show
    guilty drunk, but not high and stupid

    2. Thou Shalt Not Arrive Late at a Concert and Rudely Demand People to Get Out of "My Seat."
    not guilty


    3. Thou Shalt Not Covet the Souvenir Tables More than the Concert
    not guilty


    4. Thou Shalt Not Get Angry at Artists Who Fail to Play Note-by-Note Versions of their Greatest Hits in Concert
    not guilty

    5. Thou Shalt Not Scream Out Requests.
    not guilty

    6. Thou Shalt Not Use Cell Phones to Text Your Friends During Concerts, to Talk on the Phone During Quiet Moments or to Take Countless Goofy Pictures of You and Your Date with the Performers on stage in the Background.
    not guilty

    7. Thou Shalt Not Make Out with Date During the Concert
    not guilty

    8. Thou Shalt Not Stand and Dance at a Show When No One Else is Standing and Dancing.
    guilty

    9. Thou Shalt Not Walk Out of the Concert to make a Bathroom Run or a Food Run whenever the band plays something new or different.
    guilty

    10. Thou Shalt Not Sing Louder Than the Person On Stage
    not guilty

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