Every picture tells a story

[bluefeather]

cool Austin I hope you had fabulous time

[WalshFan88]

Thanks everyone!

HB - this was the 4th year. The first one in 2010 was a total surprise for me on my birthday. I had just lost my dog and best companion and was totally bummed out - imagine my surprise when they took me over to the cabin to "show me something" and all of my guitar gear was there and some of my old bandmates and other guitar friends were there - and LOTS of people! Really lifted my spirits for sure. And we've done them ever since, with more planning and every year it's bigger than the year before.

This year for the first time instead of just having hotdogs over a fire, we actually had BBQ catered...but I never leave the stage because of my introversion and a bit of social anxiety and I don't even take bathroom breaks! So I never ate any. I hear it was great though. I ate McDonalds before the show. LOL! I figure if I'm up on stage playing guitar, most people won't try to come over and talk talk talk - especially drunk people!

People online have a hard time believing I'm so quiet and reserved in person with strangers as online I'm quite open, extroverted, and somewhat opinionated! I feel most in my element playing guitar if I'm going to be around a crowd of people, otherwise I'm better off with people I know in small groups. Or seeing a concert, because everyone will be focused on the band and not chatting me up.

[Brooke]

Austin, glad your 'fest turned out good for you! Nice pic too!

[Houston Baby]

I never heard your story before about how Ausfest started Austin. That is so cool! Just goes to show how loved you are by your family & friends.

[Glennsallnighter]

Looks like once again Ausfest was a great success. I'm delighted for you Austin. And you know, there are plenty of people with social anxieties out there who just prefer to be more outgoing via social networking than actually meeting and talking. And that's ok. I'm glad we all manage between us to be there for you in that way, and you are a great active member of our Border!

[WalshFan88]

Looks like once again Ausfest was a great success. I'm delighted for you Austin. And you know, there are plenty of people with social anxieties out there who just prefer to be more outgoing via social networking than actually meeting and talking. And that's ok. I'm glad we all manage between us to be there for you in that way, and you are a great active member of our Border!

I'm just now seeing this. Sorry for just now responding.

Thank you so much for being supportive. It truly means a lot. There are some people in my past both in real life and online who have made it incredibly difficult to trust others over time and have dealt with paranoia and major trust issues in my real life as a result and unfortunately it's just what it is. I think in order to truly understand someone who suffers from anxiety, depression, OCD, autism, or anything of the like - you have to have experienced it yourself. It's easy for someone to be an outsider and to them you might have it all, but in actuality, you don't. The grass is always greener on the other side. I'm not perfect, but I also am not a bad person either and I know in my heart that I am nothing but good to my true friends and of course my family, who has been supportive of me with my disabilities since day one. Without them I'd have left this planet ages ago. It's their love and the love of my real life best friends and good online friends that keep me upright.

I'm very outspoken and opinionated and sociable online, and to some that seems as if I don't really have any trouble or that I'm extroverted, but the fact is, is that is just a front for my real social anxiety and my way of having some social interaction. If you were to meet me you'd probably wonder why I was so quiet and reserved. The few that have met me from here can probably attest to that. But online it seems nothing of the like. I'm able to put up a similar front when I'm onstage, as I'm focused only on my guitar and rocking out.

I'm learning to adjust and trust people very cautiously to avoid getting hurt at the advice of my family, friends, and counselor. And as such, I've become distant at times, even online. I've tried medication for social anxiety and it just does not work. I've also tried counseling and much the same. I hope one day for a miracle pill but I doubt that is happening. As much as I want it to go away, it won't.

I've cut back on my online social interaction some and am trying my best to break what is an addiction to online social networks and forums, but I will never leave here. I also feel like I need to find more people in real life that understand me and can visually witness what it is that I go through every day so they are less likely to misunderstand me or think that I blow it out of proportion. It's got to the point I won't leave the house unless it is a big concert where there are so many people I know they wont be looking at me or a Dr Appt.

I've become secure enough now that I know it is what it is and there is not much I can do, so I'm going to live my life by what I feel is right and not worry about the haters and make the best of it. I tend to let things get to me but I realize I'm not getting any younger and life's too short for drama and also worrying about what others think. You have one life and it can go in a flash.

Again, thank you for your kind message and I'm glad to be here. It's kinda like the Hotel California, you know!

[Prettymaid]

I've had the pleasure of meeting you, Austin, and yes, for awhile there I thought you were going to stand me up! Seriously, it would have been a shame to be at the same show and not meet up. I'm so glad we did.

Although not nearly to the degree of your problem, I'm not much of a social butterfly, either. It doesn't come naturally for me to start a conversation with people I don't know, although I think I'm getting better at it as I get older. Unfortunately for you, Austin, the kinds of things that normally help a shy person come out of their shell is joining the work force or volunteering somewhere - things that you're not able to do due to your health.

When we met for a few minutes after the Jackson Browne show in July, I was slightly nervous, too. But I knew that I would regret it if I didn't at least say hello. After all these years together here, you seem like an old friend!

[WalshFan88]

I've had the pleasure of meeting you, Austin, and yes, for awhile there I thought you were going to stand me up! Seriously, it would have been a shame to be at the same show and not meet up. I'm so glad we did.

Although not nearly to the degree of your problem, I'm not much of a social butterfly, either. It doesn't come naturally for me to start a conversation with people I don't know, although I think I'm getting better at it as I get older. Unfortunately for you, Austin, the kinds of things that normally help a shy person come out of their shell is joining the work force or volunteering somewhere - things that you're not able to do due to your health.

When we met for a few minutes after the Jackson Browne show in July, I was slightly nervous, too. But I knew that I would regret it if I didn't at least say hello. After all these years together here, you seem like an old friend!

Thank you for understanding and the kind words.

I honestly wasn't going to stand you up! LOL. I was waiting in the lobby and there were no empty chairs and needed to sit down because of my back so I went to my seat! So glad we met up afterwards though!

[DJ]

Hey Austin you are not alone. I hate going to social events,etc. Over the years I've gotten a little better, but...there is still that anxiety level that makes my whole chest and face turn red for no reason. I feel ya!

[thelastresort]

I'm exactly the same - I could talk for all eternity on forums or social media but in real life I'm really quiet and timid: I very rarely speak unless spoken to or prompted, and I can't stand sustaining a conversation with someone I don't really know or have a specific common interest with - not because I don't like them but because literally I can't force myself too. Gets really bad sometimes even when I'm with friends - sometimes I won't speak for hours then someone will say something and I won't be able to shut up, or I can be doing fine then someone says something that kinda flicks a switch in me and makes me go all quiet and reserved. Mind, just so long as I have the Eagles, my other interests, the forums I'm on and the family and friends who can bear to put up with me, I'm fine.