Quote Originally Posted by sodascouts View Post
Thanks guys. I feel so conflicted... I want to get over it, but I don't want to get over it either, you know? I don't want to act like nothing has changed when everything has changed.

I feel like changing the banner is getting "back to normal" and that somehow feels wrong, but... we have to move on sometime... I don't know. I just don't want to let him go, but I know I have to.

I guess I just need more time. I thought a month would be enough, but I'm still crying. I want stop crying, but when I do, does that mean I'm forgetting him? I don't want to forget him.

And I feel that when the day comes when I finally do take it down, it will really be over. And I don't want it to be. Not ever.

But it already is over, isn't it?

And I'm crying again.

So... not yet.

PS Thank God that there are people here who understand and don't judge me for being so sad about the death of someone who wasn't related to me or my close friend. It really helps.
Nancy, that's just the way that I feel. I have never had so much difficulty accepting someone's death, even though I have lost both my parents & my Dad was only 56 when he died. I don't understand this.